Since the end of treatment, I've been addressing some big issues that were easier to put off during treatment; mainly: FEAR. It's a nasty four-letter word just like the others! It's got power, but you can work on diffusing that power by acknowledging it and realizing that in the now, you're okay.
One thing that bubbles up fear [for me] are my follow-up appointments with my oncologist, Dr. K. I had one a few weeks ago. I'm feeling well and neither of us is noticing any "signs" of recurrence, which is a relief. I had five vials of blood taken last Friday and expect to get results this week. (That said, TNBC is tricky and typically doesn't show elevated CEA and CA 27.29 tumor markers like other types of breast cancer. For example, when I was diagnosed and all through treatment, my tumor marker numbers were never out of normal range. Arrgh!) As Dr. K left the exam room she said "You graduated! See you in 6 months." This means my follow-ups with Dr. K will now be at 6 month (no longer 3 month) intervals. Wahoo! The check-up leash is extended and it's nice to be at that point.
We've come a long way since my diagnosis in June 2011. Life tossed an unkind card my way, and we dealt with it in a straightforward way. I sincerely hope that sharing my emotions, losses, wins, and life events has been entertaining - if not useful - to readers.
I'd like to keep this blog going - although I'm beginning to realize that I may not quite have the prolific amount of posting that I did during treatment. Why? 'Cause I'm LIVING - living out loud! I'm focusing my energies on helping others and nurturing myself, and it feels good.
I still have plenty to say by way of sharing emotions associated with this journey, revisiting experiences I had during treatment that I'm still processing or mulling over, sharing positive ways we've tweaked our household post-diagnosis that everyone can do easily, posting news about breast cancer news/events/charities, and conveying what this survivor does after being spit out of the BC machine. I invite you to continue following my life journey.
Got questions? Please ask.
1 comment:
Wow Laura! Reading your post just now has put MY fears this week into perspective. Thank you for blogging so faithfully and for keeping all who love you and Joshua, all near and far, informed about your journey.
I have to admit that my way of dealing with your news 2 years ago was to just put my head in the sand at first, because it just couldn't be true... this wasn't happening ... not to Laura ... to reading your blog and praying for the BEST outcome possible in all your treatments, celebrating your successes, reading about your diet changes and watching mine a bit closer and thinking "cool" after some blogs about upper body tattoos (including nipple tattoos).
I think the world of you and Joshua and how you have managed this illness. I believe you have helped educate all of us who read your blog and have helped countless women entering into this nightmare... or floating in the middle of it.
So keep blogging girl, whether about BC or about recovery and all the light and dark moments that come with it. We love you and want to hear from you!
Hab' Dich lieb!
Gerda
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